


Weapon Handling

by ruff_ethereal



Series: Mechanical Hearts [2]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Anthropomorphic, Gen, Original Character(s), Original Character-centric, Sexual Humour
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-16
Updated: 2014-12-16
Packaged: 2018-03-01 19:39:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2785289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ruff_ethereal/pseuds/ruff_ethereal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Crescent Rose and Myrtenaster discuss the scythe's obsession with sleeping with Ruby, then move on to discuss combat, their owners' hands, and maintenance of their weapon forms.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Weapon Handling

**Author's Note:**

> Edit: Welp, seems Myrtenaster has a mostly flat chest. Woops.

“Have you ever considered halting your perverse sexual lust for your owner?” Myrtenaster asked.

“No, I’m her weapon;” Crescent Rose replied, “I’m destined to be with her for all of eternity.”

“Is it _really_ an excuse to try and seduce and flirt with her at every possible opportunity?”

“Hey, when you’ve got this,” The scythe gestured to her tall form, her long flowing hair, her well-endowed bust, and her voluptuous figure, “Do you ever want to stop flaunting it?”

The rapier glanced at her own small form, her neatly cut and short hair, her below-average bust, and her tomboyish figure, turned back to her ally/rival, and harrumphed. “There is something to be said about subtlety.”

“Right, right… so that’s why you and Ice Queen poke Grimm to death, one by one?” Crescent Rose smirked.

Myrtenaster’s eye twitched. “Miss Schnee and I do not ‘poke’ Grimm to death, we strike them at their weakest points with pin-point precision and lethal force.”

“So, in other words, you poke them to death.”

The rapier remained silent.

“Bet you wish your owner could just tear massive amounts of Grimm new ones like with me, don’t you? Did you see how many shots Ruby fired with me at that last fight?” Crescent Rose mimed firing her weapon form, “I was like, bang, bang, bang! Ruby was a _machine,_ just pulling and priming over and over again like clockwork…” She sighed dreamily, “It was _amazing.”_

Myrtenaster nodded politely. “Yes, I’m sure it was a very thrilling experience.”

The scythe chuckled, and leaned over her companion. “Bet you wish it was Ruby doing that to you, huh?”

Myrtenaster maintained her cool, disinterested look. “I am Miss Schnee’s weapon, I was made for her hands, not Miss Rose’s.”

“Yeah-huh. Still wish you had her magic hands handling you instead of Ice Queen’s oh so perfect fingers, right?” Crescent Rose grinned. “You know what Ruby feels like?”

The rapier’s lips twitched in the beginnings of a snarl. She remained silent.

“She feels warm, _loving,_ with just that barest hint of machine oil on her fingers.” The scythe continued, “Ice Queen must feel _pretty_ damn cold and impersonal.”

Myrternaster’s eye twitched for a moment. “For your information, Miss Schnee keeps her fingers supple, callous-free, and _clean.”_

“Yeah-huh. Does she ever get her hands dirty when she works on you?”

“Miss Schnee is very proper on her maintenance of myself, and a large part of that is using the right gloves for handling a weapon like myself, and that the cloths are clean, and well lubricated.”

“Never had that second-hand rag sensation, huh? So sad.”

 _“Excuse_ me?”

“Ruby rarely changes her cloths for me. When she rubs me down, she’s usually got the same rag she’s used for the others. All that _love_ and _attention_ she puts into the others? Some of it is still on it.”

Myrtenaster blinked. “… That sounds like poor work ethic, and I will have to go see Miss Rose about that.”

“Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it!” Crescent Rose laughed. “Hey, does Weiss ever put you back by hand?”

“Yes, she does; my inner workings are too delicate for machines.”

“Does she ever put you back bare handed?”

“… No, she always makes sure to have the appropriate working gloves for handling precise, delicate mechanisms such as those inside myself.”

“Ruby always does it bare handed for me. I get to feel her fingers inside of me, all that care and affection as she slots my components back together;” The scythe hummed, “It’s especially good when she gives me that after-maintenance rub down. Does ‘Miss Rose’ or Ice Queen ever do it for you bare handed, too?”

The rapier slowly shook her head. “… No. Miss Schnee does not appreciate the thought of her or Miss Rose’s fingerprints possibly damaging my internal mechanisms, or sullying my finish.”

Crescent Rose blinked. “Geeze, you’d think with how obsessed Ice Queen is with Ruby, she’d love to have her fingerprints all over you so she can rub them against her face and pretend she’s getting some.”

“… I am done with this conversation, goodbye.” Myrtenaster started walking away.

“Hey, does Ruby ever talk to you while she works on you?” The scythe yelled after her fellow weapon, “Does she ever compliment your ‘precise, delicate workings’? Does she ever say ‘There, all done! Don’t you just look beautiful!’ to you?”

Myrtenaster made a mental note to see Ruby about that, too.


End file.
